effyourstandards

Lost. I am now in a stereotype , a box with many others. I am labeled lost. Funny thing is if I’m lost it feels so damn good. I was Christian for a long time. I mean legalistic, cult, die hard crazy ass Christian. The odd long haired, hairy legged, skirts to the floor, sad … More Lost

This past week was tough. I was attempting to put up a healthy boundary to protect myself and not allow the behavior of another suck me into their web. I failed. Well, I did accomplish something but it brought forth pain. Just by me placing a boundary to not give my all to another every … More Tornados bring change

I had a revelation tonight. I could write it in my journal and tuck it away but isn’t this the same thing? I realized I can validate myself. I am not crazy, I am not a nagging crazy bitch. I learned worrying is a firm of control. Control doesn’t work. We don’t have to form … More A Wow Moment

I guess I need to wrap this up to move on lol. I have 5 kids and its non stop , living an hour from town sucks. Driving all the damn time! Today is pretty good I suppose, faced with standing my ground or giving in. Isn’t it crazy how if you set healthy boundaries … More History pt 3

Yesterday I totally started writing, hit save, it didn’t save blah!!! I will finish up the history later but I have some random things on my mind. I had a tornado dream like 3 weeks ago. It was a “oh crap ” moment. For the past 7 years , each time I had one something … More Random morning ramblings

Good afternoon world! I’m feeling so much better, like the clouds parted and I’m soaking up the sunshine again. After talking to an awesome friend, guru, twin lol. I feel refocused and ready to take on the world. Back to the history I suppose. So. After my nasty divorce that I didn’t think I would … More History Lesson pt 2

Its a beautiful new day. I must say after the past few days the sun is shining again and I refuse to let my demons take me down. Today I’m going to give a brief history lesson.. About muwah, yours truly, me! I feel in order to heal and grow you should share and listen … More History Lesson

Its another day. I don’t want to write this, I want to bottle all this up and leave it there. Free therapy I guess. Have you ever fought so hard to get love etc from someone just not willing to give? That’s the theme of my life. Maybe I am too needy? What’s strange is … More Drowning

Hello world. This is a short intro yet I have no clue where to start. I have been on a journey towards healing. Healing from religion, abuse, hating myself, and all the messed up issues that come along. I Shawna a fearful codependent with a knack for narcist that have little abily to love , … More Dipping my toes into this blog ocean